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Quickies
Aug 14, 2024 5:46:08 GMT -6
via mobile
Post by Don Sims on Aug 14, 2024 5:46:08 GMT -6
I just spent 30 minutes on my treadmill.
Tomorrow my goal is to turn it on.
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Quickies
Aug 15, 2024 4:53:05 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 15, 2024 4:53:05 GMT -6
How does the non-stick coating stick to the pan?!I
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Quickies
Aug 16, 2024 5:32:37 GMT -6
via mobile
Post by Don Sims on Aug 16, 2024 5:32:37 GMT -6
Overheard in the kid's section of the public library:
"Biographies are about people. Autobiographies are about cars."
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Quickies
Aug 17, 2024 7:25:27 GMT -6
via mobile
Post by Don Sims on Aug 17, 2024 7:25:27 GMT -6
My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel.
I estimate we'll be back home about 9:30 tonight.
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Quickies
Aug 19, 2024 5:00:15 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 19, 2024 5:00:15 GMT -6
I overheard my neighbor say she had had a crappy day, so I anonymously sent her a meat lover’s pizza.
She’s a vegan and I really hate her guts...
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Quickies
Aug 21, 2024 4:49:20 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 21, 2024 4:49:20 GMT -6
You’ll always stay young if you live honestly, eat slowly, sleep sufficiently, work industriously, worship faithfully, and lie about your age.
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Quickies
Aug 24, 2024 4:26:42 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 24, 2024 4:26:42 GMT -6
"No, you don't understand....
The 'get well soon' card _is_ your company's health care policy!"
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Quickies
Aug 24, 2024 4:29:17 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 24, 2024 4:29:17 GMT -6
I wanted to tell you a pun about a leech.
But I won’t – it sucks.
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Post by abuelobill on Aug 25, 2024 7:31:43 GMT -6
While the early bird might get the worm, the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Quickies
Aug 28, 2024 4:58:59 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Aug 28, 2024 4:58:59 GMT -6
A politician uses statistics like a drunk uses a street light.
For support, rather than illumination.
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Quickies
Sept 23, 2024 4:47:35 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Sept 23, 2024 4:47:35 GMT -6
Don’t even get me started on Velcro. What a rip-off…
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Quickies
Sept 23, 2024 4:49:27 GMT -6
via mobile
Post by Don Sims on Sept 23, 2024 4:49:27 GMT -6
I decided my wife would wake up with a big smile on her face this morning.
Now I can't have Sharpies in the house any more.
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Quickies
Sept 25, 2024 5:55:33 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Sept 25, 2024 5:55:33 GMT -6
Two wi-fi antennas got married last Saturday. The reception was fantastic.
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Quickies
Sept 26, 2024 5:11:31 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Sept 26, 2024 5:11:31 GMT -6
What's a dentist's favorite baseball team?
The Yanks.
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Quickies
Sept 29, 2024 5:29:09 GMT -6
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Post by Don Sims on Sept 29, 2024 5:29:09 GMT -6
I’m more careful driving my car when there’s food on the passenger seat than when there is a human being.
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