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Post by Don Sims on Oct 16, 2023 4:50:15 GMT -6
Where does one buy fancy Halloween costumes?
A bootique
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 17, 2023 5:02:54 GMT -6
Did I ever tell you about the time I got Fixodent and Bondo mixed up?
The car looked terrible, but Grandad's false teeth didn't give him any trouble at all!
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 18, 2023 5:05:10 GMT -6
Retirement is what happens between doctors’ appointments.
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 19, 2023 4:51:14 GMT -6
There's a new restaurant in town. It's called "Karma". They serve ... just desserts....
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 20, 2023 4:57:05 GMT -6
For those who fantasize about living in an earlier time... Toilet paper wasn't invented until about 1880.
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 21, 2023 5:22:22 GMT -6
A friend of mine was arrested after he got a severe shock while working on his electric car.
He was charged with battery.
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 22, 2023 6:51:18 GMT -6
You know you’re getting old when your birthday cake is a fire hazard.
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 23, 2023 4:56:31 GMT -6
There is nothing like a little tomato soup to soothe the soul.
Even if it’s cold. Over ice. With a celery stalk. And vodka.
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 28, 2023 4:05:42 GMT -6
What is Count Dracula's favorite aero plane?
Why, the Vickers Vampire, of course!
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Post by Don Sims on Oct 29, 2023 5:18:32 GMT -6
Don’t let aging get you down; it’s too hard to get back up again.
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Post by Don Sims on Nov 7, 2023 5:08:05 GMT -6
What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much? A beer-a-cuda...
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Post by Don Sims on Nov 9, 2023 5:53:22 GMT -6
What day of the week do fish hate?
Fryday!!!
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Post by Don Sims on Nov 10, 2023 6:35:06 GMT -6
I would never kill an animal.
I'm more of a people person...
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Post by Don Sims on Nov 21, 2023 4:51:25 GMT -6
We were at the beach and my wife got stung by a jellyfish. She told me, "Quick, pee on it!"
So I peed on the jellyfish, and said "That's for stinging my wife!"
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Post by Don Sims on Nov 23, 2023 5:36:07 GMT -6
Hacker: I have all your passwords!
Me: OMG! Thank you! What are they?
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