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Post by Don Sims on May 9, 2024 5:05:43 GMT -6
My computer password in Incorrect
That way, if I type in a different password, it reminds me ‘Your password is incorrect’
And then I remember...
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Post by Don Sims on May 10, 2024 3:59:11 GMT -6
"The Vegans are coming, the Vegans are coming" he shouted, so we armed ourselves with steaks for defence,
Only to find it was a lot of little blue multitentacled th.ngs jumping on us from spacecraft.
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Post by Don Sims on May 11, 2024 5:48:47 GMT -6
What do you call a TV show discussing renewable energy?
The solar panel
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Post by Don Sims on May 12, 2024 6:07:17 GMT -6
The media was quick to attack the politician's claim that "wind energy was killing all the birds", countering that cats kill way more birds than windmills...
I can't remember the last time I heard about a cat killing a windmill...
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Post by Don Sims on May 13, 2024 4:50:29 GMT -6
I was speaking to a computer technician.
"How do you make a motherboard?" I asked him.
He said, "Tell her about my job."
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Post by Don Sims on May 14, 2024 4:04:55 GMT -6
Ray turned on the Roentgen beam machine but it blew up and sadly he was no more.
He was ex-Ray.
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Post by Don Sims on May 15, 2024 4:36:11 GMT -6
No matter what they say, you matter.
Unless you get multiplied by the speed of light squared. Then you Energy.
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Post by Don Sims on May 19, 2024 5:19:25 GMT -6
I collected a lot of data trying to disprove confirmation bias.
The results were exactly what I expected.
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Post by Don Sims on May 22, 2024 11:09:48 GMT -6
What's the difference between watts and ohms?
Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.
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Post by Don Sims on May 23, 2024 5:13:31 GMT -6
What is love?
The energy of life.
What is marriage?
The energy bill ...
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Post by Don Sims on May 25, 2024 8:23:05 GMT -6
Did you hear the one about the claustrophobic astronaut?
He just wanted a little more space
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Post by Don Sims on May 26, 2024 5:42:56 GMT -6
A mummy calls a restauraunt.
- Hello, I'd like to reserve a table for the pharaoh Sakhrakhotep I.
- Could you spell it out, please?
- Of course. Bird, two triangles, wavy line, the sun, bird again, jackal's head and a scarab.
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Post by Don Sims on May 27, 2024 4:29:58 GMT -6
"How do you know the tubes have filled with saliva until you've looked" said Schrodinger cattily.
"We do look, that's what observation is all about" replied Pavlov doggedly.
The Curies declined to reply as they were busy eating their vindaloos which radiated danger from each spoonful, whilst Przewalski couldn't comment as he was feeling a little hoarse.
Dirac, as usual, said nothing, whilst Bohr and Einstein sat in a corner playing craps with the pope.
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Post by Don Sims on May 28, 2024 5:03:52 GMT -6
Reasons to Avoid Water
* Can be extracted from rocket fuel
* Is the main ingredient in pesticides
* 100% of violent criminals have consumed water in the hours leading up to their crimes
* Is the #1 cause of drowning
* Excess consumption will cause sweating, urination and possibly death
* 100% of people exposed to water will die
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Post by Don Sims on May 29, 2024 5:03:13 GMT -6
New data has claimed that only 52% of students leave school with an acceptable grade in Math.
Safe to say I am part of the 34% that struggled with it.
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